Step 1: Set your email account to auto-respond to a particular individual with simple yet thought-provoking questions.

Step 2: Ask that person one (or potentially two) legitimate questions to get the ball rolling.

Step 3: See how many emails it takes for him or her to figure it out.

For example (note, this was not done with an auto-responder, but i really dont think it made a difference):

Tue, Mar 24, 2009 at 3:53 PM rice: Make it to Germany?
Tue, Mar 24, 2009 at 7:14 PM L: YES FOO
Tue, Mar 24, 2009 at 7:15 PM rice: ping pong tomorrow?
Tue, Mar 24, 2009 at 7:22 PM L: I’m in Germany, [censored].
Tue, Mar 24, 2009 at 7:47 PM rice: wait…what?
Tue, Mar 24, 2009 at 7:48 PM L: did you read your first question?
Tue, Mar 24, 2009 at 7:59 PM rice: wha…?
Tue, Mar 24, 2009 at 7:59 PM L: ok dude. Are you in Bonn, Germany? Answer yes or no.
Tue, Mar 24, 2009 at 8:30 PM rice: ummm….wha…?
Tue, Mar 24, 2009 at 8:33 PM L:
You asked: Make it to Germany?
I said: YES [FOO]
then you proceeded to ask if i could play ping-pong tomorrow.
How, pray, are we going to play? via video conference or are you coming over?

Tue, Mar 24, 2009 at 10:28 PM rice: waah?
Tue, Mar 24, 2009 at 10:29 PM L: keep thinking we’re playing tomorrow.
Wed, Mar 25, 2009 at 8:24 AM rice: whhhhhaaaaa?

I deem this a success.

my hair was bright yellow and my power level was over 2 million. Its going to be a good day.

“Don’t drink the water.” It’s a common phrase, usually said in jest. Heck, it’s even the name of a DMB song. These four words have become a part of our American culture, a snooty sneer at countries with lesser water purification systems. It is easy, then, to forget the true meaning of this phrase, and to merely assimilate it into our pop culture.

Folks, I am here to tell you that this phrase is not a hip trend or a mere play thing for our amusement. Other such trends have perished at the hands of time: Airwalk, polygamy, L.A. Gear, flapper dresses, Huffy, white bell bottoms with a glowing afro and a huge piece of gold hanging around your neck, to name just a few. But the phrase “Don’t drink the water” will not fade. It will remain a part of our lives colloquially and substantively simply because it is true. It is not a mere ploy, a joke, a cliche, or a subtle advertising campaign for Evian. When you hear “Don’t drink the water,” then don’t drink the water.

Perhaps it was the ice, or perhaps it was some bit of water in the food, freshly sprayed vegetables even. Maybe it was the mouthful of water I accidentally swallowed while swimming in the Mexican caves of Cuzama. All I can tell you is that the Gulf of Mexico never looked so nauseating from 40,000 feet as it did last week.

So please, heed my warning and all future warnings, embedded in song lyrics or advertisements though they may be. If someone tells you not to drink the water, don’t assume they are attempting to make a funny. Take their warning at face value. A little dehydration in the beginning can save you a week of life-threatening dehydration later.