In the beginning, there was the sandwich and the antisandwich. But the populace divided, and some did support the sandwich, while others did support the antisandwich, and so did society itself split and crumble  like stale bread at its sandwich-related seams. And the battles fought did shake the core of humanity itself.
So it is told that when all was lost did Steve the Baker appear. And so he did declare an end to the fighting as the battles had ravaged both sandwich and antisandwich alike, but he did determine that of the sandwich and antisandwich, there could be only one. So was a challenge issued to either side to put forth its best wich upon which Steve the Baker would pass judgment in a final test. Thus did each side search far and wide for the greatest sandwich and antisandwich makers in the land. And upon choosing the best did each side ask its maker to present the fruits of his labors to Steve the Baker. Steve the Baker did judge these wiches, and upon deciding so declared to the people that though each was delicious, the bread of sandwich did serve as a protective womb, keeping ones fingers clean during consumption. Thus did Steve the Baker decide that the the sandwich was the one true wich. So ended the Battle of the Wich. And the people rejoiced.