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December 2nd, 2007
| Having a bad day? Wake up on that wrong side of the mattress? Sad and lonely with a void crying out to be filled? Feel like eating a puppy to fill that void? If that’s you, puppy pancakes should be your next stop. |
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How did the idea of the puppy pancake come about? Probably the Chinese. It doesn’t really matter. The real point is that here in America, we substitute flour for dog flesh, and if you order puppy pancakes in Beijing, beware the language barrier. |
| Sure the pancakes look healthy and delicious. But the real test for chicken and rice–do they make you happy? Would consuming a puppy pancake a day keep that psychologist away? For the ultimate test, we went to the streets.For this study, we randomly selected an emo from the local Virgin Megastore and rated her emo-ness from a scale from 0 to 10, 0 being Hillary Clinton, and 10 being My Chemical Romance. Upon hearing the name My Chemical Romance, she gazed off into the distance and muttered, ‘If I had a soul it would be crying.” We judged her to be a 7. |
| Next, we introduced the pancake and monitored the results. After being convinced that puppies in fact were not dying for our pancake pleasure, she sampled a pancake and results were instantaneous. Hope and love were reborn to give her meaningless existence a brief speck of joy. We rated her a 5. |
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| We here at chicken and rice judge the puppy pancake to be a success. That’s all for this week. We’d like to leave you with this piece of advice. Don’t name your puppy pancake. It just gets awkward. |
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These puppy pancakes look delicious. Where does one find the recipe? As chicken and rice advances, can we please keep images of delectable treats away from images of dog consumption?
Emo rating of comment: 3.5?
Comment by PuppyEater — December 3, 2007 @ 6:58 pm
= Puppy pancakes =
* 1.25 cups flour
* 2 tablespoons sugar
* 2.5 teaspoons baking powder
* 0.5 teaspoon salt
* 1.25 cups milk
* 1 large egg
* 0.25 cups peanut butter
* 3 tablespoons butter, melted
* 6 chocolate chips
* 1 strip bacon (can be replaced with emo girl)
* whipped cream (optional, not shown in photo)
* 1 emo girl
In a large bowl, whisk together flour, sugar, baking powder, and salt. In a small bowl, beat together milk, egg, PB and butter until smooth. Combine wet and dry ingredients, stir until combined.
Heat non-stick griddle over medium heat [chicken: these pancakes seem to require lower heat and less time than my normal variety]. Drop 0.25 cups butter onto griddle for each pancake and cook until bottom is golden / air bubbles rise in middle of pancake. Flip.
Recipe makes 8 pancakes, sufficient for replacing two puppies. Arrange on plate, adding half a strip of bacon for tongue, chocolate chips for sensory organs, and whipped cream for fur/hair on top of head.
Feed to emo girl, watching her become non-emo.
For even more power, add bananas.
Comment by chicken — December 3, 2007 @ 11:48 pm